Meet Mu, a French bulldog mix girl. She is young but has already had many babies. She gave birth to them and they were taken away. Mu just arrived from China and found her home for now on Linda’s Wonder Farm with dozens of dogs, pigs, hens and other animals that have been rescued from a doomed fate. Mu’s eye is missing as a result of a nasty infection but she is beautiful! I bet her babies are prize winning dogs.
When I met her the first time, Mu needed so much love and attention. She parked herself right on my lap and gave many kisses and needed to be seen, held and loved until she dropped from exhaustion later that day. If other dogs came by, she pushed herself closer to me so she could be touched, as if when she didn’t get the attention, there was something terribly terribly wrong. “Show me you love me, I love you,” was her mindset.
I find this need in myself and in others as well. The need to shout to everyone we meet “love me” as Hafiz writes it in his poetry.
We all have a deep need to be acknowledged and loved. We seek to be seen and validated, sometimes at the expense of others just like Mu pushing others aside to be right there, visible, in the front row.
What creates this craving for constant reassurance? Is it the ego, old trauma, insecurity or social anxiety…? Mu has lived through trauma in her past. She was used as a breeding machine and was mistreated. Next time I saw her, she greeted me readily and stayed close to me. I played my bamboo flute for the animals on this farm and the dogs came by to listen. Mu wasn’t so sure and kept her distance for the first time looking a little scared. I let her sniff the flute to know what it was, and as I lifted the flute back towards my face, she cowered expecting to be hit. Poor darling, the flute looked a lot like a wooden stick that delivers pain. So I played just a little longer and then gave her plenty of cuddles.
This need to know all is ok, that we are enough, that we are cared for… is it based in a fear that the only other option is getting hurt? And what if others get love and attention instead, perhaps right in front of us? Mu pushed others aside and pressed herself harder against me leaving no space for anyone else when that happened. But what about the others?
What about me? Do I leave enough space for others? In conversation? On the stage of life? What about you and the Mu in you? When you walk in the room, do you need all eyes on you? Do you need to have all the answers? The best jokes?
I do love that strong little doggie girl. I pray for her to land in a loving home, to be able to be less frightened, to let go of that hyper-alert state and be at ease. I pray for all of us to recover from hardship and trauma and to be content, to be the Light.
Everyone you see, you say to them,
Of course you do not do this out loud;
Someone would call the cops.
Still though, think about this,
This great pull in us
Why not become the one
Who lives with a full moon in each eye
That is always saying,
With that sweet moon language,
What every other eye in this world
Is dying to Hear.
For more information about the Wonder Farm and the Wonder Dog Rescue please visit this website: https://www.wonderdogrescue.org/wonderfarm