friends, their generosity and obsessions,
children’s joy, their eyes filled with wonder,
the hurt and disappointment, mine and yours.
I see the pain of unreconciled differences
hanging over us like dark clouds,
doors close quickly and words disappear.
I see the pain of unwelcome gifts.
Receiving in awkward silence things, care, harm
you meant for me to have.
Turning towards the Light,
I can see the pain of holding on to what no longer is,
the good and bad.
Like trying to wear old clothes that no longer fit
How does one live with memories?
How does one let this pain pass through?
How does one move with changing seasons?
Fall turning into the winter while remembering
the warmth of the sun, or remembering
those simple times before the fire came
and devoured it all.
I look at it and smile,
like seeing an old friend
I used to spend a lot of time with.
I choose to peel away a little from
this familiar pain.
The heaviness starts washing away,
eventually it dissipates.
I feel the fresh air and I hear myself sigh.
My body starts moving again.
We are all making it through,
bringing Light into darkness.
The clenching softens,
dawn’s cleansing power enters in.
The wild call comes as
the Soul shines through again so
hungry for life, taking us for a dance
As we move to this new year and consider our resolutions and invite new into our lives, it is helpful to reconcile the old, that which holds us in the tight grasp of the past.
"It is never too late for any of us to look at our minds. We can always sit down and allow the space for anything to arise. Sometimes we have a shocking experience of ourselves. Sometimes we try to hide. Sometimes we have a surprising experience of ourselves. Often we get carried away. Without judging, without buying into likes and dislikes, we can always encourage ourselves to just be here again and again and again." ~ Pema Chödron